Thanks to pregnancy, labour and
breastfeeding, mothers tend to experience an instant and profound connection
with their baby. For fathers, however, sometimes it can take a little longer
for them to relax and feel comfortable with their newborn child. Here are some
top tips to help dad develop an equally vital connection.
While you're preoccupied
and gazing at your baby through rose-tinted glasses, it's important to remember
that your partner needs the chance to develop that connection too. He may feel
completely underqualified to take on such a responsible role but by giving him
a little time and space, he'll build that confidence and fill the role like you
know he can. Here are a few ways to help the relationship along.
Pregnancy bonding
All mothers know that the
bond you feel with your baby starts the second you find out you're pregnant.
Dads should also take those nine months to start building a connection by
chatting, singing and playing music to their baby. Involving your partner in
all of the decisions from room decorating to the labour process will also help
them to feel a part of things.
Through the birth
Many dads comment that
they feel absolutely useless during their wife's labour, but us women know that
their role is almost as important as the doctor's. We need support and
encouragement, and we seek it from our partners during labour. By offering
support and staying close, new dads can help us to stay calm, which has an
obvious effect on our newborn's health and wellbeing.
Skin-to-skin contact
A study by Swedish
researchers published in the journal Birth: Issues in Perinatal Care showed
that a father having skin-to-skin contact with his baby immediately after a
Caesarean birth offered the same calming and comforting benefits to the child
as a mother having the same contact. Encourage your partner to hold your baby
close to his shirtless chest after birth to help father and child develop a
close bond.
Stay up-to-date on baby's routine
If you're a stay-at-home
mum, you'll know absolutely everything about your baby — from what time
they last cried to how long they'll probably sleep for tonight. Keeping your
husband involved in the everyday things like sleep times and general health
will help him to feel deeply involved in your new baby's life, even if he has
to spend eight hours a day away at the office.
One-on-one time
Have you found yourself
hovering over your husband and baby and never letting your partner have alone
time with your newborn? Give them the space to develop their own unique
connection. Your husband may feel like he's under scrutiny or "not doing
things right" when you're around watching him, whereas if he's given a
chance to take care of bub by himself, he'll build confidence and realise that
he's perfectly capable. This will also give you a great excuse to head out for
a quick walk around the block, take a nap or read a book in the bath, so enjoy
your time and let them enjoy theirs!
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